Everyone Wants To Punch Jauan Jennings In The Nuts

A person is going to get hit in the nuts from time to time. This is a normal hazard of living in the world, which is filled with stray blows in contact sports, waist-high furniture in dark rooms, out-of-order turnstiles, rowdy pets, and small children with timeless senses of humor. It is no moral failing to be smacked in the nuts. However, it is perhaps a sign when it becomes a pattern. I would urge readers to live their lives so that no one ever says of them, Yes, I fully understand why someone would want to punch them in the nuts. It was well-earned, and more people should punch them in the nuts.

San Francisco's Jauan Jennings got punched in the nuts last week, by Carolina safety Tre’von Moehrig. Moehrig was suspended; sack attacks are frowned upon in polite society. Jennings was fined, too, ostensibly for retaliating, but in retrospect it was possibly because the NFL knew he deserved it somehow. Jennings brushed off the beef, saying "I was just responding to some childish behavior."