High-Level, Actionable Insights From Watching Doubles Luge For The First Time

To the uninitiated, luge itself might seem a silly sport, given that the average person might guess it mostly consists of holding onto a sled real tight as it goes fast down the ice. Of course, this opinion is wrong. Luge requires athleticism and dexterity, the ability to steer using the slightest movements of your shoulder or leg around the track's curves, all while holding onto a sled real tight as it goes fast down the ice. But there may be no better way to demean a legitimate sport than to take a guy who's already doing it and put another guy on top of him. I would obviously and enthusiastically watch doubles snowboarding or doubles speed-skating, where the world's leading athletes try to go real fast while giving a piggyback to a smaller person, but I can't say it would be for the athleticism.

What is there to say about doubles luge that has not already been said? A lot, I think. Alluringly homoerotic and abjectly nonsensical, doubles luge might be the strangest event of any Olympics, winter or summer. Unlike other baffling Olympics sports like biathlon and curling, doubles luge has no legible explanation rooted in Scandinavian military training or bored Scottish people. Doubles luge appears to be the consequence of somebody watching luge and being struck by the idea of stacking another guy on top of the first guy. Apparently back then there were no bad ideas.