Tony Dokoupil Eats Heaps Of Shit In First Week As CBS News Anchor

Last month, CBS News Editor-in-Chief Bari Weiss decided to make Tony Dokoupil, then the host of the network's three-hour morning show, the new lead anchor on CBS Evening News. In any other circumstance, it might be hard to figure out how this promotion was issued to a guy whose job was to be a court jester for bleary-eyed Americans getting ready to go to work. But the thought process here is pretty easy to follow: Dokoupil, a Zionist, made a fool of himself trying to grill Ta-Nehisi Coates during a 2024 interview about his latest book, which features a chapter about Israel's subjugation of the Palestinian people. The previous CBS regime reprimanded Dokoupil for his pro-apartheid line of questioning, but Weiss wanted to make it clear that she rewards that kind of thought in the newsroom.

Put more directly: This moron got himself a fancy new job by being an ingratiating dipshit. Dokoupil officially took over as lead anchor over the weekend, where he was entrusted to update viewers about the United States' murderous attack on Venezuela that resulted in the kidnapping of President Nicolás Maduro. A few days before his debut, Dokoupil released a statement in which he repeated many of Weiss's favorite platitudes, promising to correct the sins committed by previous versions of CBS Evening News.